ripperomar

So it's been over 12 months since i moved to this place.
I miss new york more than ever. the year went by pretty fast.
i still can't accept this place as my own, this place is cool, people are nice
school system's better slash overrated. but i miss my real friends.
i miss the subway. i miss the parks. the ghetto people ( : . the europeans who can't speak english
and the diverseness of the city. im not playing soccer for my school, cuz of stupid popularity. i'm definitely
better than alot of the kids on the team but "no one knows me" as the JV coach said.
i'm already in my junior year and it feels like it hasn't been too long since the last time i got pushed around for
being a freshman. i was quite tall for a freshman. : ]
i miss the windy new york city weather. no matter what rain or shine or even snow, it was always wicked windy.
the winters did suck in nyc, that i have to say. but i loved taking the bus/ taking a walk through central park during dusk and
then going home whenever the hell i felt like. i miss munchy (my best friend's dog) and i miss my other two my best friends mo and john too.
i miss tiffany too, jeffrey, stephany, jess, ranveer, marina all those people.
i miss my soccer team, lol. i used to get tooled on for being one of the two freshmen on the team, but i still loved playing alongside them.
i miss the gyro stand in the city.
i miss the F train
I miss hillcrest H.S
i miss having a really nice turf soccer field 3-4 blocks away from my house.
i miss skateboarding
i miss sleep overs

I miss having a life

Someone dig me 

Yippidy Yap. It's 1:57am and i don't wanna sleep : ]

I feel really overwhelmed, i don't know why. Today was a really good day. Or i should say yesterday.
I'm listening to coldplay now, they're pretty awesome and they make my ears smile.
I feel like i'm crushing on someone but i don't know who. : ] , and it's not one of those scary feelings , i feel good about it. it's my imaginery crush?? or i'm just weird. this journal is so much fun, i'm talking to myself. Woo!

Hey Mir! You're awesome!

I pretty much forgot i had a livejournal until i checked facebook earlier today. The school year is over, and i've been having a good time so far. I'm in NY right now and i'm happy after a really long time.

Hey you.
I am bored.
Nothing is going wrong with me, nothings going right either.
I sleep way too much? I love how i am so anti-social right now...I was pretty fucking different at the beginning of the school year and before it even started. i loved to meet new people. now i don't.

 i want to see coldplay live in june, and i want to go to the rave in nyc in july and also see nine inch nails in august.

Bye.

It's 12:26 am right now. I am very bored and also sleepy but music is keeping me awake.
I've been drinking alot of water!
I am a fake plastic tree!
I am bored.
and
People Suck.

I want to go back home.

Erm. I finally did some homework tonight, for 2 1/2 hours. i still have to read this book called little tree. and there's a new "debate" in my head that i need to win. i need some help here. 

i tnod  tnaw siht

so there's not alot going on, my weekend was basically at roche bros. and went to this little concert/show type thing at danny's place. it was pretty good. i met a few new kids, none of them share the common taste as Mir.
life at home sucks. parents are too loud.. same old story. i dont have hw. that's good. and i miss you.



"Every Day Is Exactly The Same" by NINE INCH NAILS

I believe I can see the future
Cause I repeat the same routine
I think I used to have a purpose
But then again
That might have been a dream
I think I used to have a voice
Now I never make a sound
I just do what I've been told
I really don't want them to come around

Oh, no


Every day is exactly the same
Every day is exactly the same
There is no love here and there is no pain
Every day is exactly the same

I can feel their eyes are watching
In case I lose myself again
Sometimes I think I'm happy here
Sometimes, yet I still pretend
I can't remember how this got started
But I can tell you exactly how it will end


I'm writing on a little piece of paper
I'm hoping someday you might find
Well I'll hide it behind something
They won't look behind
I'm still inside here
A little bit comes bleeding through
I wish this could have been any other way
But I just don't know, I don't know what else I can do

So pretty much everyday i have to go through a series of chaos at my house. My parents won't shut up and they don't make sense. Well it's mostly my dad who's a pain to basically everyone in my family. I'm still trying to figure out ways to keep myself out of this, not staying home is a good one, but i don't always have that option. It's cold outside, and there's really no where to go. I'm stuck in boxborough, i have a horrible atmosphere at my house. School is going okay, no more social problems at least from my side but there are one or two things that bothers me still. I miss my best friend David, i miss New York City, i miss my brother. There are alot of things that's inside me that i can't let out and ofcourse I am not letting them out i till i think it's time. I miss soccer, i miss my old high school, i miss past experiences. Life is not at all bad for me right now, and i'm not complaining. I don't entirely make sense but somethings are hard to explain through words and people won't experience my feelings and won't get how i'm trying to say what i'm saying. ok i really do not make sense at all.

So our school made us take this personality this thing, we had to answer questions all period long and then it summarized our personalities and potential careers.So here's what my personality's like.

Understanding you, Mir
People like you are quiet, gentle, and caring. When people first meet you you may seem reserved and cool. But once you get to know and care about someone, you are warm and very loyal. You tend to be cautious about jumping into social activities and may resist trying new experiences. Instead, you like spending time with one or two close, trusted friends or spending time alone, enjoying the things that really interest you. You are considerate, respectful, and sensitive, and usually find tension or conflict between people very uncomfortable. Since you have strong beliefs about right and wrong and try to always treat other people kindly, you may be easily hurt or offended by the insensitivity or callousness of others.

You are also unpretentious and down-to-earth. You speak clearly and literally, and want others to be equally explicit in explaining directions or stating their expectations of you. You tend to be selective about things like food and clothing, are usually tidy and organized, and prefer to be dressed appropriately for all occasions. You're also careful with your money and possessions. You are probably blessed with an excellent memory for details, especially facts about people, but may find it hard to read between the lines or deal with a lot of abstractions. Since you like to make a decision and stick with it, you are often annoyed when plans are changed suddenly. You're not a big risk taker and are happiest with a predictable daily routine. While you want to please the people close to you, you are rarely willing to compromise on really important issues.

Note: Based on our assessment, your personality type is "ISFJ."

Your Strengths and Blindspots
Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. The key to finding the best path for all people is by using their natural strengths and becoming aware of their natural blindspots.

Your strengths may include:

• Thoroughly researching information and collecting relevant facts.
• Making thoughtful decisions based on practical considerations.
• Conducting organized, well-planned out research.
• Impressing people that you are a hard-working, ethical, conscientious, person.
• Being a good listener and not dominating the conversation.

Your blindspots may include:

• Being too humble, and not presenting your accomplishments in the best light.
• Appearing to be less enthusiastic than you may really be.
• Not being open to explore possibilities that don't fit your current plan.
• Not anticipating how present decisions may affect you in the future.
• Lacking objectivity when making important decisions.

now you tell me. is that who you think i really am?

Well hello again journal.
the past two day's have been pretty bad. fever/colld/bad midterm scores.
yesterday i got myself a new mp3 player. a 8gb sansa view. cost me around 175.00$ish
i hope it's worth the price i paid for it, looks quite neat and user friendly. so school today started off
with yoga, i didn't like it very much. still thinking about moving to speedball or not, the day pretty much went
by like any other day so there isn't anything interesting going on in my school life right now. Lunch was the usual
i ate, started doing somehw, then started walking, last 15 mins of lunch hung out with Caroline and Kergil. then spanish class was like everyother day too! screaming freshman. after i got out of school me,tj,emily,caroline and irene hopped on tj's bus to go to his house. it was raining pretty hard and andrew decided to get a ride there or something later on. at tj's place i drank soda and played music...kinda lame.. but played 3 games of pool with caroline, scratched on the 8 ball first and won the second game and then half way through the third game she quit.
well then after wards we started watching random comedy materials on youtube about pokemon,standup comedies. random stuff like that. then irene's dad came and picked us up and dropped me home. he missed the driveway while coming to my house, it was raining so hard, you could hardly see anything.
i gots back home,  and then slept for 2 hours or so. really strange thoughts are still in my head but i don't know who could be the right person to talk to me about this and get me through this "disease".

On the computer again. The fever is getting worse. Grr.

So I've made this live journal account. Now what. Write on it. But not tonight. Too sleepy, too late.